Lately, I’ve been feeling personally attacked by my household items. Not emotionally—physically. By jars, bottles, pill containers, and those impossible-to-open hard plastic clamshells that make you wonder if the product inside is even worth it.

Let’s talk about bottle caps. Apparently, manufacturers are shaving off millimeters to save plastic. Great for the environment, terrible for aging fingers. Water bottle caps are now so small, I need pliers to open them. And not the dainty ones—I’m talking about the heavy-duty kind that could rebuild a car engine.

And don’t even get me started on salad dressing bottles. I recently had to go down to the basement and return with my husband’s pipe wrench. Not a dainty twist. No. I practically performed a full-body power move just to get to my vinaigrette.

Then there’s the dreaded: “Squeeze both sides and twist” medicine bottle.
That’s cute. I’ve squeezed, twisted, begged, and cursed—and still had to call in backup (a.k.a. Mr. Pliers).

And if you’ve ever tried opening anything encased in that hard, clear plastic clamshell packaging—the kind that requires a razor knife, battle gear, and possibly a tetanus shot—you know the struggle is real.

Let’s not ignore chip bags, which now require the strength of a professional wrestler or the strategic accuracy of a heart surgeon to open without blasting chips across the room.

So no, it’s not just you.

But okay, maybe it’s a little bit us. Grip strength does decrease as we age. Sigh. That’s why my kitchen drawer now includes:
✔ A 5-in-1 jar opener
✔ Non-slip rubber grippers
✔ A pair of trusty scissors
✔ Industrial-strength pliers
✔ A sense of humor
✔ And possibly a small blowtorch (kidding… mostly)

If you’ve got any secret hacks or MacGyver-style tools to help open modern-day Fort Knox packaging, share them below. We need each other.